When asked to name hiz favourite ten albumz, Donnie refuzed. Instead he brought thirteen to the table, and with each album he addz hiz two cents about why they mean so much.
An old bandmate of mine came to one of our showz, and wuz chattin' with me after the gig. Him and I alwayz talk muzic and the stuff we're currently listening to at home. He mentioned The Hellacopters and said that they kind of reminded him of us, and that I should check 'em out. I wuz thinkin', "She-it, if they sound like us then they gotta be cool!" Sure enough, when I put them in my player... they out-cooled us by leaps n' boundz!
My whole style of playing changed when this album came out. I remember around eight of us went downtown on the Friday night of the week it wuz released, and all bought a copy. Each of us had long hair, and wore black leather jackets, torn jeans and white high-top runnerz... (Yikes! The good ole dayz) It came with two recordz becuz the songz were so long, and they (Metallica) wanted to retain the quality of their recording. Funny thing wuz, the album wuz co-produced by the drummer and the guitarist, so the bass wuz all but in the mix. The 'quality' that they were trying to maintain in the groovez of two vinyl recordz wuz actually never there!
I'm thinking, the only reazon Cliff Burton didn't role in hiz grave, wuz becuz he couldn't hear the bass! Anyways, this LP of epic porportionz turned me upside down and revamped my drumming tenfold. I even told my hair stylist to try to make my head look like Lars Ulrich's!
I worked in the Provincial Museum az a janitor cleanin' sh*t for a couple of yearz. Winter time wouldn't bring in many people, so I had alot of spare time on shift. I spent many-a hourz listening to muzic and drinkin' copious amounts of coffee in my second floor janitor closet.
At this time in my life I wuz heavy into the bud, and it made for some interesting excursionz to the musuem rooftop during sunrize. I revamped my muzic library to go with my new found joy of baking, and found that all the Ozzy Sabbath albumz (with the exception of that f**kt up one), were the ultimate listening experience for my green-clouded mind. I became a big fan of Bill Ward'z drumming in no time, and soon made a sloppier player of myself. To finally see Sabbath play Ferries Wear Boots in 1999 wuz a dream come true, az well az giving me the biggest boner ever.
Nearing the end of my tenure az a metal drummer, my guitarist's brother introduce us to Captain Beyond; a band that put out three albumz from 1972 to 1977. Their first and their third album (Dawn Explosion) knocked me off my feet. The opening track Do or Die said it all for me, so I did... and quit the band. Captain Beyond brewed alot of late night hot-boxxed jamz with Tommy Black in this meat locker rehearsal studio we used to rent. This album put me back on my rock n' roll path.
Ahhh, one of my heroz; Bon Scott. The dirtiest ladiez man of the world. He didn't consider himself a lyricist, but more a writer of dirty poetry. From track one through until the end, this album iz quintessential AC/DC. The Highway to Hell album wuz my favourite of theirz until I picked up this one a few yearz ago.
I think every fan of rock n' roll muzic should own this. AC/DC are the masterz of sticking to a formula of writing tunez. If death iz ever prevented, theze guyz'd still be kickin' ass in 100 yearz without a doubt.
The first time I ever went into a strip club, the dancer Sara Ashton wuz bustin' movez to Sensible Shoes. For me, Diamond Dave'z videoz came to life in that instant, but even better, she wuz gettin' naked.
The unfortunate thing about this period in muzic wuz Kurt Cobain. That winey bitch came along and f**kt everything up. All of a sudden it became cool to be unhappy and the whole muzic world stuck its head up its ass. What would be David Lee Roth's finest album went virtually unnoticed az most of the world came to wallow in their sea of sorrow.
Meanwhile, I wuz in my backyard BBQin' burgerz by myself doin' high kicks believing that this wuz quite possibly the greatest album of all time!
Hey Kobain! If your listening... when I die, I'm gonna find you, then I'm gonna kick yer ass.
In grade seven me and my buddiez did an airband of Another Thing Comin' in front of the school. We had guitarz made out of tennis rackets and plywood. We wore leather jackets and studded wrist bandz... we were the epitomy of cool. For the first time I had younger girlz screaming at me. Whether it wuz in lust or sheer fright, it didn't matter. They were screamin' and I wuz rockin'. I had taken my first step at accomplishing a goal: becoming Gene Simmons. *(also, me and the girl who did the Tina Turner airband grew fonder of each other!)
The Priest were definitely the first heavy metal band in my world. Faster songz, screaming vocalz, it all made sense; annoy anyone who didn't like your music. Their Unleashed in the East album wuz the first one of theirz that I'd heard, but this iz the one where they found their way. It put them over the top, and I could say, "See, I told ya so!"
When I saw the gatefold of this album, I thought they were chicks! Albeit, Mick wuz an ugly one, but it got me in touch with my feminine side. Theze guyz made everything cool. Tommy Lee in the Looks That Kill video made me see what showmanship wuz all about. I twirl my sticks becuz of that man.
If in the future a porno comez out with me boinkin' a chick on a boat, it'll be hiz fault.
Two wordz: Neil Peart
If needed to place a reazon az to why I do what I do, it'd be becuz of him. Animal from the Muppet Show didn't have sh*t on Neil. He iz the professor of the drum kit. The master of the skinz. A freakin' genius damn it!
I bought my Tama drums due to Neil playing them for many yearz. Sh*t, I bet if he drove a Volvo I'd buy one, and I f**king hate Volvoz! A live version of the song Working Man really got it goin' for me with Rush, but this album wuz the first one I remember having in my brotherz collection. The woman on the cover.... you could see her pantiez! The Scorpions Love Drive album cover may have got my blood pumpin' to new placez, but Herman Rarebell wuz nothing like Neil Peart, Geddy shreiked way better then Klause. ...and if you haven't heard The Spirit of Radio give yer god damn head a shake cali-fornyahhhh!
Tommy Black had a roomate Bruce who owned an extensive record collection. Tom made a tape of Sly's Dance to the Music and told me I had better hear what I had been missing. Sylvester Stewart wuz all about makin' muzic that made ya feel good. If ever there wuz a Dr. Feelgood, he da man.
The greatest eleven minutes in muzic iz; Dance to the Medly. Me and my bass player at the time would go to the summit of Mt. Tolmie in the band'z disco van. Flared wheel wellz, magz and sidepipes... We were definitely the grooviest, stonedest mofo'z up there. For the most part, couplez would go to the summit and do what couplez do on the top of a mountain in their car. We, on the other hand, would be foggin' bats two at a time waiting for the opportune spot of the third section of Dance to the Medly, a part called Music Lover. It'd hit that magical moment, and we'd crank the stereo so freakin' loud it cleared the mountain top every single time. There wuz no inspiration point when we were around man!
We'd laugh our assez off after ruining everyone'z chance at goin' the distance, and then cringe later that we blew up the cardboard speakerz we had in the van!
3. VAN HALEN- 1984
'I get up, and nothing gets me down' - the opening line on the album. Many timez in my life if I needed a pick me up, I'd put Jump on the stereo. If I had to chooze one song to have with me forever and ever amen, this'd be the one. I own a bootleg video from a show off of this tour, and it's so amazing. By the end of the concert, I've touched base with each of my emotions.
Happy - this iz the freakin' unbelievable!
Sad - why'd this band have to end?
Mad - Eddie! You a**hole!
Glad - I can watch it over, and over, and over again.
Confuzed - why the electric drumz Alex?
I'd see interviewz with David Lee Roth from this era, and he didn't really make any sense for the most part. Keep in mind I wuz quite young at the time, so in later yearz after my introduction to the bottle, it all came crystal clear. He wuz a wizard, a prophet, a perveyor of female flesh, a maniac drinkin' machine... everything I wanted to be. I bet ya ten bux the man can walk on water.
Az a wee boy, this album changed my life forever. I went from wanting to be Bernie Parent of the Philadelphia Flyers to Gene Simmons of KISS. I fell in love with the girlz on the album cover, and they were only a god damn oil painting! Great artist I tell ya. Love Gun iz my favourite KISS song out of all of 'em. Why? I don't know? Just iz.
A band of super heroez that all sang their own songz. They had bubble gum cardz, comic books, dollz, their own television movie... they were larger than f**king life! Yearz later I met them, and couldn't even speak. What would I say? What could I say?
Eddie Van Halen changed the face of rock n' roll guitar playing when this came out, and no one will ever have such an impact of difference again. I swear to god I get a suntan when Van Halen'z on the radio. This album iz so good, it's almost emotional for me.
Listening to Van Halen takes me to memmoriez I never had. I think it's more of hearing their songz and seeing where they came from. A perfect example of what I'm talkin' about would be 'Feel Your Love Tonight': "We're gettin' funny in the back of my carrrr, I'm sorry honey if I took you just a little to far-arr" It's like hey man, I wuz there too Dave!
The world iz full of blue skiez and sunshine when Van Halenz playin'. That's what it's all about, and it don't get any better than that.


Copyright © 2003 Zappnin Black. All Rights Reserved.